Letters Written, But Never Sent
by FreeMyMind
Summary: Rachel writes to Noah about her engagement, but never sends the letter. How many other times does this happen? What if he wrote her too? What happens when they  finally reads the others? WORK IN PROGRESS! contains Finchel mentions.
1. Chapter 1

**I got inspired to do this. Well, what happens that causes her to write the letter happened to me and I wrote the letter, so yeah. **

I wrote the first letter that I would never send when I was 17, and had just said yes to Finn. A bad dream, which I had more than I had good dreams, woke me up at 2:49 in the morning, and something was making me do it. So half awake, I wrote Noah Puckerman a letter on Hello Kitty stationary from when I was 8.

_Dear Noah,_

_ I want you to be the first to know, because it should have been you. I am engaged to Finn. He got the girl again. I'm sorry. This summer, when we had our heart to heart, I know that we admitted our mutual feelings, but I couldn't do it. I swore to you that I would break up with him, and I couldn't do it, and couldn't do it, and now I can never do it._

_ It really does come down to the fact that he is the one I _should_ want, he is the one I'm supposed to end up with. He is the one my dad's approve of. He is the one that everyone expects me to be with. I've hurt him so many times Noah. I don't want to do it again, especially now that he knows the truth about his dad. I know I've hurt you too, Hell, we've been dealing each other blows since pre-k. But you are the strong one. You are the one who I think will move on. _

_ Please don't think that this means that I don't love you, but I can't do it to him. _

_ Yours forever,_

_ Rachel Berry *_

The second I signed it and added my signature star, I fell into my bed and was asleep in a second. When I found the letter the next morning, I almost threw it away. Instead I folded it up and stuck it in my empty desk drawer. Then, I slapped my smile on my face and put Finn's ring on my necklace, because the added weight to my hand was uncomfortable.

**I'll defiantly do at least one more chapter, but tell me if I should do it when they are graduating OR when she and Finn have their wedding. I am considering doing it for a life-long story, maybe even having some where he writes her, but I need you to review and tell me what you want.**


	2. Chapter 2

**This time it's puck POV. And I know I switched tenses on you guys, sorry! But it comes out the way it does. I'll try to fix it, but I really liked this one so I left it as is. Oh and in the letter the mistakes are supposed to be there. This takes place after this weeks episode.**

My fist slams into the firm material of the punching bag. With each swing, I imagine I am punching Finn's head. Yesterday, Rachel lent down over my shoulder to help me with my Spanish and when I tried to sneak a peek (hey! She's f'ing hot!) I saw a lot more than some epic boobage. I hiss under my breath, "Fucking Hudson. Fucking ring. Marrying HIM! It. Should. Have. Been. ME!" each word is accented with a blow, the last one succeeding in snapping the chain. I scream wordlessly one last time as I kick it with all my might.

"Puckerman!" a husky voice calls. I swear again under my breath as Beist rounds the corner. She sees me standing over the bag and shakes her head. "Puckerman, you'll re-hang the bag tomorrow." I sigh and walk away, muttering "Yes couch." She calls after me, "Puckerman!" I turn to her and she nods, "Whatever it is will work it self out. Trust me boy." I hold her gaze a moment longer and turn and exit the locker room. A whole day of school ahead of me.

For once, I don't sleep in English. Instead I watch as Rachel smiles to Finn's face and rolls her eyes the second he looks away. This summer she told me that his stupidity and hypocrisy were on her last nerves. Now she was sticking herself with that forever. Someone who didn't know any better would hope she would come to her senses or divorce him. But she believed in marriage. She wouldn't do that unless there was any other option. I had lost her. Through my self-pity I hear my English teacher say, "Each of you will write a letter to someone who you haven't told something too. Seniors, this is one of your last chances!" I decide to do this assignment.

_Dear Berry._

_Look, I know about the frickin' engagement. All I wanna know is why in hell you're throwing away you're dreams for Finn! I don't even care that its not me! if it was Mike, or Artie, or someone who was going places, I wouldn't give a rats ass. But its the boy whose future is a mechanic shop in Lima. This is not my Jewish American princess. This is Rachel-Finns-girlfriend. I swear they're two different people. What has he sucked out your essence? _

_Rach, I hope to god that you know what your doing. If you change your mind, you know where to find me. and if you do it to late, ill be where your supposed to be. NEW YORK. yeah, I got into NYU, because I thought that you'd actually fulfill your promise to dump Finn. Guess not. _

_Like you fucking care,_

_Puck_

_P.s. this went wrong. I'm sorry babe. I still love you._

Once I finished, I read it over and started to crumple it up. No way in hell was I going to actually send that pussy-fied piece of crap. Then I paused and folded it in half, and stuck it in my notebook. Not to give to her, I ain't that whipped, but to read again every time I think about falling for another girl.

That day just before glee, its only the two of us in the classroom. She turns to me and smiles. "Hey Noah." I nod and ask what I always have (let her tell me when she wants you know?) "Break up with Finnessa yet?" A pained look crosses her eyes, and she stares at the floor and whispers, "I think that maybe its best that we remain friends Noah. I'm so sorry." Right then Kurt bounces into the room on his heels. He starts blathering on about how well Blaine's doing and Rachel only spares one more glance at me with her beautiful doe eyes as I sit in a corner.

When I get home I toss the letter in my shoe-box of berry., Where I keep a few mementos from our things together. **(Hey, I borrowed this from someone's story, I'm sorry I couldn't find it again to ask for permission**) I gotta burn that thing. Becca's music from the next room blasts through our thin walls and I listen to the perfect song, despite actually DESPISING the frickin artist.

A plan formulates in my mind. Drop it an octave, slow it, add some guitar, and I'm set.

Schue is annoyingly surprised that I actually have a song, but I stand in front of the group and say in a cold, flat voice. "this summer, I spent a lot of time with this girl and we didn't do anything that way, but I fell in love. and I _know _she did too. And I'm not as lucky as Sam and Mercedes, cause my chick doesn't believe in us enough to take the leap. So I have a message for you."

_**Look What This Girl Done Did To Me,  
>She Done Cut Me Off From A Good Good Love.<br>She Told Me That Those Days Were Gone.  
>(Gone, Gone, Gone)<strong>_

_**Now I'm Sitting Here Going Half Crazy.  
>Cause I Know She Still Thinks About Me Too.<br>And There Aint No Way In Hell, That I Can Be Just Friends With You.  
>(You, You, You)<br>And I Wish We Never Did It,  
>And I Wish We Never Loved It,<br>And I Wish I Never Fell So Deep In Love With You And Now There Aint No Way That We Can Be Friends.  
><strong>_

_**The Way You Felt, No Faking It.  
>Maybe We Were Moving Just A Little Too Fast.<br>But What We've Done We Cant Take It Back.**_

_**(Back, Back, Back)  
><strong>_

_**Now Im Sitting Here Half Way Crazy.  
>Cause I Know She Still Thinks About Me Too.<br>And There Aint No Way In Hell, That I Can Be Just Friends With You.  
>(You, You, You)<br>And I Wish We Never Did Itt,  
>.comcan't_be_friends_lyrics_trey_  
>And I Wish We Never Loved Itt,<br>And I Wish I Never Fell So Deep In Love With You And Now There Aint No Way That We Can Be Friends.**_

_**And Now All I Can Say Is Lalalalalalala.  
>Laaaaaa..<br>Lalalalalalalala  
>Lalala ohhh<br>Lalalalalalaaa..  
>Aint No Telling What We Could Of Been<br>(Aint No Telling What We Could've Been)**_

_**And If I Knew we'd End Like This,  
>I Never Would Of Kissed You Cause I Fell In Love With You.<br>We Never Would Of Kicked It, Girl Now Everything Is Different  
>I Lost My Only Lover And My Friend, Thats Why I Wish We Never Did It.<br>And I Wish We Never Loved It,  
>And I Wish I Never Fell So Deep In Love With You And Now There Aint No Way That We Can Be Friends.<strong>_

_**And Now All I Can Say Is Lalalalalalala.  
>Laaaaaa..<br>Lalalalalalalala  
>Lalala ohhh<br>Lalalalalalaaa..  
>Aint No Telling What We Could have been<strong>_

Of course my boys Artie and Mike jump in and help me harmonize. I purposely avoid looking at Rachel until I finish the song. When I do, she has her acting face on, the one I rarely see unless she's about to cry. Schue stands and says, "Well, Puck, thank you for that…. Powerful performance. Next time though, maybe that's something best said in private." Everyone was looking around the room trying to figure my chicks identity out, and most eyes had landed on Quinn. I nodded and hissed, "Whatever you say Mr. Schuester. I'm gonna head out now." He pats my shoulder. "that's probably a good idea. Actually, everyone can head out early if they want." That pair of watery doe eyes meets mine as she hurries out past me.

**i know I posted the last chapter only like, 2 hours ago, but this one once again snuck up upon me, plus I'm going out of town this weekend with my choir sooo, I probably can't write. But pretty pretty please with a scoop of puck and a berry on top review!**


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